Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT)

With Tracy Douglas: Your GenX Therapist in Janesville, WI, and Online Across Wisconsin and Texas

Unlock the Untapped Wisdom of Emotion: The Key to Heal Hurt and Disconnection

Y’all, so many of us we were done wrong when it came to our feelings as we grew up.

Why might you need Emotionally Focused Therapy?

As kids, we were given mandates about out feelings like shut them down, ignore them, and just move on already.

Many of us were criticized for being too sensitive or too dramatic or we were making mountains out of molehills. And, while I don’t know you yet, I’m betting you may be like me, and you grew up without many examples of how feelings can be used to know yourself and connect deeply in a caring way with others.

Thinking was revered as the holy grail of knowledge. USE YOUR HEAD was a message we were given over and over.

Sadly, we weren’t taught how our feelings are an incredibly complex and invaluable data processing system that provides us with the clarity, meaning, and connection that serves us incredibly well in our lives.

Thankfully, we know better now and can connect to the immense innate wisdom that, rest assured, resides in all of us.

What is Emotionally Focused Therapy?

Here’s how Emotionally Focused Therapy can help you:

Discover the wisdom in every emotion, even the tough ones.

Schedule your consultation today.

Looking for an EFT therapist?

Hi. I'm Tracy Douglas - Your GenX Therapist

Something I adore about this approach is that while you may come in for a particular challenge or a set of them, what I see happen over and over for my beloved clients is the experiencing and learning they gain improves other areas of their lives that they didn’t even know needed help.

To be honest, emotionally focused therapy changed my life, too. Personally and professionally.

When I began studying it in depth, it was like I’d entered a whole new world where I saw what was going on and had the wherewithal to walk into it with a sense of confidence, joy, and meaning. I want this for you. I want this for everyone.

What I fucking love about this approach is that at every single step of our work together, I can tell you what we’re doing and why we’re doing it. And while there is always mystery in life and in therapy, what is a complete certainty is you’ll have a committed companion and expert guide while you’re on your transformative journey.

This shit works, good people. Find out for yourself.

Success Stories

MH
MH
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I came to Tracy to work through my anxiety and depression. She has not only taught me specific strategies to help me stay present and grounded when my anxiety seems to be out of control, but also daily management skills for my depression and anxiety.

She has taught me communication skills that I have been able to use with my loved ones to open up with them about my struggles. In being able to speak more openly with my loved ones, it allowed me to feel comfortable enough to bring my husband to some of my appointments. Those sessions helped us learn how to better understand each other’s needs more clearly.

The discussions we have are not always focused on present events; she has also helped me dig deeper to see where my anxiety and depression come from. Tracy has helped me recognize these sources and taught me that while these things happened to me, they don’t define me. Most importantly, she has taught me about seeing myself in a more positive light.

would happily refer Tracy to family, friends, or anyone looking for therapy services. Her compassion is second to none. You can feel that she truly cares about her patients and doesn’t just go through the motions. She is invested in helping her patients reach their best potential. Tracy has a great ability to connect with people and make them feel at ease when they talk with her. She is an exceptional therapist.

RK
RK
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The time I’ve spent with Tracy has been transformative. I’ve had a handful of counselors through the years, and they all helped to some degree, yet I felt no different. I knew more about myself, but I didn’t feel different until I began working with Tracy.

To simply state my own journey, I’ve been looking to open a deeper emotional connection within myself and others. To stop being afraid and to reconcile the trauma and abuse I suffered in childhood. The progress I’ve made from being unable to mention or acknowledge what happened to being able to mention it here is proof of her amazing work. I would not be the person I am today without her, and I wonder if I would even be here to write this if not for her.

She’s exactly what her client needs when they need it. Whether that’s a by the book therapist one day to a friend to cry with the next, she adapts and innovates on the fly, only to the comfort level one can tolerate in the moment. What I do know is that I am always getting her best and the best care possible.

I could fill pages of praise, lines and lines of commendation, but the summary of it all would be that Tracy Douglas is a one in a million therapist. I wholeheartedly recommend Tracy with full confidence that she will help others with the same kindness and care she has provided not only to myself but countless others.

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FAQs About Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT)

Click any question to learn more.

Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) has two foundational ingredients. The first is our emotions, hence the name, lol, and the second incorporates the connections we have with the people closest to us—partners, family, friends, and even ourselves.

It focuses on understanding and transforming the emotional responses that shape our interactions and relationships. In EFT, we’ll work together to uncover and explore the underlying feelings and needs that drive your behaviors and conflicts. By tapping into these emotions, we aim to create a stronger, more secure bond with yourself and your loved ones.

It’s like rewriting the music of the emotional dance steps that keep us stuck in patterns, helping you build a deeper, more authentic connection with the people who matter most. Ready to break the cycle and find new ways to connect?

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EFT can be incredibly helpful for couples, families, and yes, individuals, too, who want to improve their relationships or who are struggling with emotional disconnection.

If you find yourself stuck in the same gotdamn old arguments with your partner, feeling glacially distant from loved ones, or struggling to understand a chaotic inner emotional world, EFT could be the perfect fit for you.

It’s designed for anyone looking to unlock the innate wisdom of their authentic selves and to foster deeper, more meaningful connections, whether in romantic relationships, family dynamics, or even with themselves. If you’re ready to strengthen your emotional awareness and experiencing and build a more secure connection, EFT might just be your answer.

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Alright, folks, let’s break down emotionally focused therapy (EFT) into its three main stages because, let me tell ya, it’s a game-changer for understanding and enhancing our connections with others.

First up, we’ve got the ‘De-escalation’ phase. This is where the magic starts. We’re diving deep to uncover the patterns that keep us stuck in a loop of frustration and disconnection. It’s like finally figuring out why you’re always stepping on the same emotional rake and getting smacked in the face.

Next, we move into the ‘Restructuring’ phase. Here’s where guides the therapist and you start reshaping those interactions. It’s about learning new dances, so to speak, so you’re not always stepping on each other’s toes. Instead of the Cha-Cha of Chaos, you’re moving into a Tango of Trust.

Lastly, we’ve got the ‘Consolidation’ phase. This is where you take what you’ve learned, the new steps and rhythms, and make them part of your everyday life. It’s the victory lap of EFT, where you see the positive changes in your relationships take root and grow.

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EFT is like having a heart-to-heart with your inner self and your loved ones, guided by a therapist who’s got your back. It’s all about getting to the heart of your emotions, understanding them, and using them to guide you towards stronger, more secure bonds. Whether it’s with family members, your partner, or just yourself, EFT is about turning those emotional battles into bridges.

EFT therapists are like emotional detectives and architects rolled into one. They help you spot the negative patterns that keep you stuck and then collaborate with you, in a way that’s both respectful and kind, to build new ways of relating that are all about connection and understanding. It’s not just about fixing what’s broken; it’s about nurturing growth and helping you bloom. With EFT, you’re not just solving problems; you’re transforming your relationships at their core.

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For those of you who geek out on info like I do, read on to find out more. So, there are two big players in the therapy world for individual, couples, and family therapy: CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy) and EFT (Emotionally Focused Therapy). Imagine CBT as that friend who’s all about logic and solving problems head-on. It’s focused on identifying and changing negative thinking patterns and behaviors. You’ve got an issue? CBT’s got a step-by-step plan to tackle it.

Now, about EFT. This is the friend who wants to dive deep into your emotional world to reveal its wisdom it as opposed to sticking to surface solution finding. EFT centers understanding and transforming your emotional responses and relationship patterns.

While CBT is a doctor writing you a prescription of what to do and when to take your meds, EFT is like a gardener who goes to the core of the dis-ease you’re experiencing and helps transform it at its roots so your relationship with yourself, your loved ones, friends, and/or family can thrive and bloom.

There are lots of paths to healing, good people, and Emotionally Focused Therapy is a gorgeous, effective one that resonates deeply with me and many of my clients.

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Alright, let’s clear up some confusion here. EFT is like the umbrella term for working through emotions to create change, but when we talk about EFT for Couples (EFCT), we’re zooming in on the love connection. Think of EFT as the general approach to untangling emotional responses, whether it’s solo or with others. It’s about getting to the emotional root of what’s bugging you.

Now, EFCT, that’s specifically tailored for those romantic entanglements.

We’re talking about 20 sessions of deep diving into emotional bonds, restructuring interactions, and turning those fights into moments of understanding and closeness. It’s supported by a body of research showing that it’s not just talk; it’s a road to a stronger, more emotionally connected relationship. So, while EFT can be a solo journey or a team effort, EFCT is all about the duo dynamics.

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During an EFT session, expect to get up close and personal with your emotions to discover what needs healing and honoring—don’t worry, though, we’ll go at your pace.

We’ll talk about what’s going on in your relationships, current and past, and explore the emotions driving thoughts and actions. This kind of work isn’t about pointing fingers or rehashing old fights.

Instead, it’s about understanding the less skillful emotional patterns that keep you stuck and working together to change them. You’ll leave each session with more insight into your emotional world to create more secure and loving connections. It’s a process of discovery, healing, and ultimately, transformation.

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Unlike many therapies that focus solely on thoughts or behaviors, EFT zeroes in on emotions—the real glue that holds relationships together. It’s based on the science of attachment, which tells us that humans are wired for deep emotional bonds.

EFT works to strengthen these bonds by helping you understand and express your emotions in a healthy way. We’re not just skimming the surface; we’re diving deep into the emotional undercurrents that shape your life and relationships. It’s a highly experiential therapy that not only mines the richness of your past, but also uses present dynamics to elevate your healing and growth.

If you’re looking for a therapy that goes straight to the heart of the matter, EFT is where it’s at, good people.

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Yes, EFT has a solid track record for helping couples navigate through some of the toughest challenges, including conflict and infidelity. It helps partners understand the emotional wounds that have led to conflict or betrayal and guides them in rebuilding trust and emotional safety.

By focusing on the emotions and unmet needs driving the behaviors, EFT helps couples reconnect and strengthen their emotional bond. It’s about repairing and rebuilding from the inside out, fostering a relationship that feels secure and fulfilling. This isn’t all rainbows and sunshine and good feelings, though.

There’s a lot of facing pain and expressing vulnerability, but you won’t be facing it alone. You’ll have a skilled guide at your side to help you find your way to authenticity and healing whatever the end result may look like. If you’re ready to do the work, EFT can help you find a path forward, together.

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It sure can! EFT recognizes that emotional distress, like anxiety or depression, often has roots in relationship issues or unmet emotional needs. It helps you explore how these feelings impact your relationships and vice versa.

By addressing the emotional triggers and strengthening your bonds with loved ones and your own precious self, EFT can reduce feelings of anxiety or depression. It’s about creating a safe emotional space where you feel supported and understood. If you’re feeling overwhelmed by your emotions and are seeking senses of safety and security to free you from emotional suffering, EFT can help you find solid ground.

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The core principles of EFT revolve around understanding and reshaping emotional responses to create safe, secure bonds. Us practitioners of EFT don’t see people as problems to be solved or fixed. Instead, we see patterns of disconnection with self and others as an unskillful ones that needs attention and care.

Not only do we focus on identifying the emotional patterns and cycles that cause troubles in your relationships, we also work together to understand these emotions, express them safely, and meet underlying needs and longings. Our goals are to create secure attachments where you and your loved ones feel safe, valued, and emotionally connected.

By transforming these emotional cycles, we help build more secure, fulfilling relationships that last to bring meaning and joy to our lives.

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So, I’m gonna give you the real low down on my learnings and experiences. Some research on Emotionally Focused Therapy presents it as a short-term therapy, ranging from 8-20 sessions. And emerging research has shown that when trauma is present in one or both clients’ histories, it’s not unusual for therapy to encompass years.

I’ve experienced the totality of that spectrum with my beloved clients and always prioritize the unique and specific needs and goals. Throughout the whole process, I’m very transparent in stating where we are and I whole-heartedly welcome and deeply appreciate feedback around my client’s perspectives about pacing and/or if more or less work is needed.

I joke and and am serious that my goal is to get you out of therapy in as efficient a manner as possible so you can be in the world living and loving in ways that are true, joyful, and meaningful to you. And whatever the time it takes is the time we’ll give it. Together.

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Sooooo much beautiful, valuable research!!! And more and more being studied and compiled! EFT is one of the most researched and validated forms of therapy for relationship issues. Numerous studies have shown its effectiveness in helping individuals, couples and families build stronger, more secure bonds with themselves and each other.

It’s based on solid science, including attachment theory, which has been studied for decades. Rigorous research of this modality shows real, lasting change. If you’re looking for a therapy with a strong foundation and proven results, EFT is a great choice.

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Look for a therapist who has specialized training in Emotionally Focused Therapy. << Raising hand to share that I’m certified which means I passed rigorous standards to illustrate that I use it effectively. >>

Find someone who not only understands the EFT framework but also has experience working with the specific relationship issues you’re facing. Check their credentials, read reviews, and, most importantly, trust your gut.

A good therapist will create a safe, non-judgmental space where you feel understood and supported. Don’t be afraid to reach out and ask questions to see if they’re the right fit for you. If you’re ready to start this journey, I’m here to help guide you every step of the way.

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Emotionally Focused Therapy can help you with manymental health concerns, including:

Trauma

Depression

Burnout

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